For women life is something that happens to them.
For men -- and here I mean the 20% or so who are dominant men, but those are the only men who count as men as far as women are concerned -- life is something that they make happen.
It's a fine difference, but it lens out into a major difference with time and repetition due the rewards of aggression. If you wait for life to happen to you, you are unlikely to accrue any wins beyond those that nature blesses you with due to biology. You can cheat a little here and there, but at the end of the equation small cheats don't accrue wins.
Ultimately this is why dominant men run the world.
You are right in the sense that most men do not make an effort to understand women, and I am going to say something, even thought I have not had time to read your "Mr. Darcy" post from head to toe, some day, but no time now, so if I say something off, sorry.
ReplyDeleteI used to think I hated alpha males, but then a friend made me realize a true alpha is the one who really tries to connect on a deeper level and understand women instead of dumbing them down and treating them like sex objects who do not know what they want and they are incapable of making decisions which are not emotional or based on a guy, that a some men get a fake sense of confidence out of objectifying women and narrowing them down to stereotypes and act as if they were alpha. So the men I run away from are the pushy and passive-aggressive men who think they can just come to me and let me know that they would like to get laid without bothering to get to know me first (and oh they get emotional! I do not toy them around, I let them know I'm not interested and wish them the best, but they can't just take a no without stomping like little boys)
But this post is a bit sexist, and maybe you are not a sexist guy (again, I haven't had time yet to read your recent Mr. Darcy one, but I feel like I need to stand up for my gender on this, otherwise who will?).
Victimization and how 'life happens to women' instead of them making it is a cultural thing that women are made to believe since childhood: that we have to have a man to rescue us (so maybe they are trying to appeal to your knight in shinning armor?), that we are incomplete without one, that marriage is some sort of holy grail and the key to eternal happiness. Not true, I am a female, and for the record, I do not come here to "show you a lesson" or to tell you "I spit guys like you". Neither I found your blog because I was looking at why "men are mean" nope, I was looking to answers for why some women act like they are better than the rest of us (hilarious post by the way, thanks for saying you don't like it, I do not feel like I should be in a "competition for men", and your post made me feel validated).
I personally have been called "the whore", of my own boyfriends!! "the one he'll use for sex and dump for me" by insecure ladies who do not end up with my exes anyway despite their attempts and derogatory terms used to narrow me down to something "less than them". But the type of women you use to make a generalizing statement like this are the ones who cater to you because you fit some description of the man they are convinced they need, no offense to you, you seem pretty smart, but when you make statements like this you are not understanding all women out there, not even where the ones you describe come from or why they act this way (or maybe you are, and I just haven't read it), and before we jump to anything, I am not saying I am better than them, I am just very aware that many things are not what they tell us, one of them is that winning the approval of a guy who is aloof is not what love is, its about ego. Sorry, I learn from my own and other people's experiences. I'm sure when you go on a deeper level with someone you are a lot more, but from your posts I see a guy who feels like he doesn't need to lift a finger to get laid and you go with it. But I wouldn't go to try to convince an aloof guy like you, simply because I like men who show me they care about getting to know me and respect me, and I refuse to think that finding someone who likes me for me is some competition I need to win. I guess all I am here to say is: don't generalize, women are complex human beings too.
Have you ever met a dominant woman? I'm usually the one to ask out, plan and dump someone in a relationship. All of my relationships have ended in a good way though.
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