Tuesday, November 28, 2017

Why so aloof? Sometimes The Second Girl wins

If you've read much of my blog, you might have noticed a pattern that occurs when I describe social sets. I'm talking to one chick, and then her friend cuts in. You can see a prime example here. I'm not a huge fan of a lot of PUA-type theories, but I think social proof, the notion that people find something more interesting if they see others coveting it, is a solid one worth keeping mind.

This post has been on my mind for a while, but I've wanted to process it. Back in January of this year, 2017, I had met a chick at a fairly large party, north of 100 people in a private space that a friend of mine has access to. I was talking with some friends, and the conversation was getting pretty loud -- the kind of loud that attracts additional participants.

This girl who had been sitting by herself in the far corner of the room comes over, asks to sit down at the table where I'm standing. I say sure and keep going at the conversation. She's trying to participate, but she's pretty demure and this is a really loud and raucous set.

Eventually three of her friends show up and join the conversation. We're all BSing and eventually the topic turns to BDSM. One of my male friends I had been talking to and a completely separate female friend who was there are both heavy into some serious shit. I've been known to partake, too.

The Quiet Girl is intrigued and trying to steer the conversation. However, two of her three friends are much more boisterous. The one is in a committed relationship. The other is recently divorced, and she's little thick in the way I tend to like my women -- small top along with serious ass and thighs.

Every one of them is somewhere between pretty to downright knockout. The Committed Chick is a professionally trained dancer, 26, and frankly a high 9 in hawtness. The Thick Girl, 29, is a former competitive horse rider. The two demure girls are sisters, 20 and 25, both a little skinnier than I tend to like.

At some point, the conversation turn to pain tolerance. When it comes to consensual sexual violence, this is my wheelhouse. Not something I bring up much on the blog, but I don't fuckin play when it comes to hair pulling, spanking, pinching, etc. I've had partners look like they were in an auto accident when I was done.

The Thick Girl has been nudging in and trying to get my attention. She's definitely trying to cut her friends out.

At this particular moment, she decides she's gonna play big, and says she's always wanted to try BDSM. My male friend who's into it says something about having the right equipment with him, and he asks her if she wants to try nipple clamps.

Occasionally, I am possessed of the right thing to say. There are just moments where I can draw a line from A to B to C, and this was one of them. I looked at the Thick Girl and said, "No need. I can do it bare-handed."

She looks instantly interested. Pulls her shirt up. Pulls her bra down. present titties.

I look at her and say, "This is gonna hurt. I've had women say it's worse than nursing a teething child."

She laughs and leans in. I say, "Alright." I grab a nipple, and she drops to the floor in pain, barely missing the table with her face.

She's laughing, but not getting up. There's a whole room of people sort of waiting to see how this plays out. I just keep looking at her in agony.

Finally, after more than a full minute, she pulls herself up by the table. I ask her how it felt. She replies, "OMG, that was painful but I loved it!"

The room is relieved. My female friend asks her if she is okay. The Thick Girl says yes.

After a couple hours, we decide to go barhopping with the group. By this point, the Thick Girl is flying on raw energy after some dancing with me and a little more physicality (not anything quite so vicious as the initial nipple pinch, mind you).

She drifts off several times, and eventually the Quite Girl works her way over to me and we start talking. She's dropping indications of interest left and right. Knee touches, etc. Laughing at all my jokes.

I don't think too much of it because by this stage I have the Thick Girl eating out of the palm of my hand. She's grabbing drinks for the group, dancing with every guy there, laughing, and even torturing a beta male friend who's the manager of the place we settled down at to keep drinking.

I'm in full social game mode by this point. I even start up a conversation with a whole separate set of women who were there when I realize they all were alumni from the university I attended.

This ends up being an almost going til dawn kinda thing, as the two groups of women merge into one giant pile, along with me, the beta male friend, and another male friend of the first group who decides to move in on the alumni association. (Strangely enough, the Committed Girl's BF shows up, but he doesn't participate. Conversely, that dude was pretty fuckin hot in his own right, so . . . can't envy a winner too hard, man.)

Eventually the Thick Girl and I trade information and part ways. We make sure to set a date for the next weekend.

Party Hard

Next weekend comes, and I set up a date at what is as underground of a club as I know. This is the full people on Molly type place. I've seen it go to 10am. This is as sexualized a club environment as you'll ever see -- I've seen people literally fuck on the dance floor.

The Thick Girl calls me a little before midnight when we're supposed to meet up, and she's basically complaining that the Quiet Girl wants to come out with us. I don't have an issue with this, but apparently the Thick Girl is already in mate-guarding mode. I tell her to just sort it the fuck out because I'm gonna go get my party on with or without them. (Even when I have my social game on, aloof and uninvested is always a card I'm willing to play.)

Imaginably, she finds a way to appear -- without the Quiet Girl -- within ten minutes. To say things went the direction I went them to would be an understatement. And she was pretty damned vicious. This is full-on, back-and-forth, fucking up-against-the-wall in public shit. She even smacked me in the face. (Which followers of the blog will recall, is a go sign for me.)

I also win the "who has more energy game". She gave up and went home at 3am. I kept going and picked up another chick by 5am for a session of totally disposable makeout and titty play. (I'm a dedicated ass man, but damn that girl had some titties.)

By the middle of the next week, the Thick Girl is in emotionally deep. Probably a little deeper than is healthy. She's in full-bore "I need to hear your voice" at 2am on a Wednesday night mode. There's a lot of the standard barfing her emotional guts out to me stuff, which, again, you'll find happens a lot with me, as seen here.

She also gets into some comfort testing, emotional support stuff. And that's where things kind of went downhill. I told her this is a lot to pin on a guy she met a couple weekends ago and that she should be leaning on her friends for that kinda thing. Then she admits that the friend who serves that role is normally the Quiet Girl, and . . . well, you can imagine how that worked out.

This goes on like this for a couple more weeks until it becomes pretty clear to her that I'm intense but not the perfect guy. I'm a good conversationalist, but you'll find a limit to what that actually gets ya. I confess I did some pretty shitty things, like telling her about the 5am Titty Girl when she asked what I did the rest of that night. I also told her she shouldn't fuck up her friendship over a guy -- which, ya know, ladies, is actually pretty goddamned good advice.

As you can imagine, that sort of emotional and physical intensity is unsustainable. The End.


There's a lot to unpack from that story.

Probably the most obvious for regular readers is something to the order of "holy shit, that's a lot of social game for an aloof guy!" It is. As I've said elsewhere, though, I can roll social game hard when I feel the impulse to do so.

I do think it's funny how many times I go for the girl who cuts in. I love energy and verve from women. It works. Ladies, if you're trying to win a social set, it's definitely worth a try.

One thing that sticks out in my mind is how much women treat their close friends as sexual competitors. It never fails to amaze me how much effort they'll put into cutting in to grab a potential mate and then completely cutting their friends out in a retention effort.

I probably should have given the Quiet Girl more attention, but I've learned over the years to focus on banking the clear win when I have one lined up. You can definitely fuck yourself up trying to make a harem play or shooting for a threesome. Given the Thick Girl's later emotional outbursts and demonstrated mate guarding behaviors, I feel like that was the right play.

The Thick Girl and the Committed Girl were the queen bees of the group, and I feel pretty confident that favoring the Quiet Girl would have been a uniquely bad plan. Cutting against the queen bees when they're still present tends to backfire.

Anyway . . . for once you kids get a pretty detailed and relatively non-aloof story (if you just ignore the part where the Quiet Girl loses bigly).

Probably some good social dynamics stuff to ponder in there. A lot to be said for being a little outrageous and making yourself the center of attention in a social set. It probably helps that my male friend (the guy into BDSm who's mentioned waaaay early in the story) was a skinny dude who wasn't gettin any love from the girls at the initial party. If you can use your male friends as props, well . . . hey, at least he got to see some titties, right? He still retells that story.

There ya go. A relatively non-aloof tale from the Aloof Guy.

Wednesday, February 1, 2017

If I tossed your dog shit comment, that means it was dog shit

Comment moderation is on, people. Make peace with that fact. If I think you're trying some lame ass shit to get me to moderate a comment and show it, I'm tossing it.

My view on dumbfuck commenters is the same as what they tell you about old meat in your fridge: when in doubt, throw it out.