Thursday, October 25, 2012

The chick who yelled at me for being aloof

One of the reasons I am the way I am is because I get a bit tepid about the over-the-top behavior women throw my way.  This previous weekend I got called out by three separate women on Friday night.

The first one was a chick who approached my inside the bar and made a very overt and direct play for attention.  I think I'll save her for a later post, because there was a lot of good stuff about game to expound upon from my interaction with her. 

The third one was a hit-and-run outside the bar who basically snarled at me and asked, "What the fuck's wrong with you"

The second one is the interesting one.

Now, upfront, she was Asian.  I don't mean to be racist, but . . . I generally don't find Asian women attractive.  An Asian girl has to be an 8+ with a serious figure to have any hope of getting my attention.  My taste leans toward Irish girls (a redhead has to be pretty hideous for me to not like her), hispanic girls and skinnier black girls.

Asian Girl was maybe closer to a 6.  For my personal tastes, I'd classify her as a 4.5, but I'm aware that most guys rate Asian women much higher than I do. So, take from that what you will.

Asian Girl kind of made eyes at me when I came into the bar.  I noticed her looking but didn't make much of it because she wasn't my type.  At the low-end of the cute scale.  No figure.  Not dressed to kill.  Not having fun.  No personality.  No punk.  No inner strength.  Just nothing that flags a girl for me.

As the night progresses, Asian Girl resorts to one of the time-honored tricks of Girl Game.  She finds a seat at a table directly in front of me and forces herself into my line of sight.  She has herself turned about half toward me.  No drink.  No texting.  Just sitting, half facing toward me.

I ignore her.  Not interested.  She hits the minute-thirty mark and opts to rotate to a spot over by the DJ booth, where she sits on a stool and sits with her back half turned to me.  She sat there adjusting her skirt.  She took her jacket off.  She looked over a couple times.  And she scooted stool to place herself more directly into my view.  No play.

The minute-thirty rule

Wait.  What is the minute-thirty rule? 

I hold to be true the theory that during a woman's indirect approach of guy, she will place herself in proximity to the guy she likes for about a minute and thirty seconds.   This can go up to five minutes, but don't bet on it if you really like her.  Minute-thirty is about the amount of time a woman with high self-esteem can handle being ignored by a guy she likes.  After that, she will have to reposition and recalibrate her approach.

One one occasion,  I had a chick who went for the full five, then danced with her friend and then did another minute-thirty before absolutely exploding.  She grabbed her stuff and yelled at her friend, "Fuck this.  I'm leaving."

Feigned disinterest by women

Her recalibration choice is classic Girl Game, too.  The back half turned move is feigned disinterest.

One thing you have to understand is that a central conceit of womanhood is that all guys are horny to fuck all women.  Maybe a woman will give you enough points and assume you won't fuck a total cow.  But, the vast majority of women believe that all men, given a full, open offer of sex, will not decline sex with a woman who rates out as a 5 or higher.

Understand what feigned disinterest is about.  If a woman rates herself a 5 or higher, she believes that all men with a pulse want to fuck her.  So, if she encounters resistance from a man she rates worthy of screwing a 5 (or even higher), her first instinct is to test whether he's a full-on alpha male or just a cute beta who has a bit of game. 

Feigned disinterest -- especially after she's made her first overt orbit into your space or your line of sight -- is about drawing you out.  Her goal is to see if you're playing at alpha or if you've really got the goods.  If you're playing at it, she knows your sexual interest will get the better of you and you'll approach her.  This comes with the added bonus that women like to feel of a cold approach, even if she had to induce you into it.

Explosive behavior

The problem with feigned disinterest is that it threatens serious cognitive dissonance between how she perceives herself and what is happening. Remember, she begins with the assumption that all men will fuck a 5 or higher.  Her approach indicates she rates herself a 5+. 

This presents a cruel problem to her.  Your failure to approach her has to arise from something.  But, what can it be?

1.  The guy is gay.  

I actually had a chick who was frustrated with hitting on me -- she was doing a full, direct approach outside the bar after the bar had closed. And actually she did pretty well considering she was completely fucked-up drunk.  After not getting any play, she just flat-out asked me, "Are you queer or something?"

Not to my credit, I took the bait and I ended up fucking her an hour later in her SUV in the parking lot.  For all you girls who come here looking for advice on how to hook an aloof guy, maybe you should try this one!  Not a shining moment.  But, to her credit, she got what she wanted.

2.  There is no option two in the female mind.

To be blunt, women refuse to consider the possibility that their rating of themselves is wrong.  They're also very reluctant to believe their rating of you could be wrong.  Women refuse to consider social retardation as a possible explanation -- because that would mean they misread you and ended up hitting on a lower value man.

And this is where the blow-up comes into play.  Women's egos don't handle rejection well at all.  This is where you get "Fuck this. I'm leaving."  That chick couldn't handle being blunted.  So, she blew up and left.

Continuing with the story . . .

Asian Girl didn't get a chance to blow up.  Why?  Remember how this story has three women in it?  Remember the one who directly approached me?

Well, this is where direct approach girl comes in.  She comes in and we are engaged in her best attempt at direct approach for the next hour or so.

By the time I was done with Direct Girl, I had relocated and Asian Girl was nowhere to be seen.  Not that I was looking.  I just don't recall seeing her after that.

Until . . .

I was standing outside the bar after it closed.  I like to get some fresh air in me and sober up before I drive.  Funny thing.  I'm not a big fan of being arrested or dead.

A few minutes after I went outside, Asian Girl comes out with a white guy.  They seem to be friends, although I don't recall seeing them together inside.  He's exuding betaness and friendzoning. 

I don't think much of it until she decides to stand next to me.  I ignore her until a half minute later she rather loudly says something to the effect of "I was watching you all night and you did was sit by yourself.  What the fuck's wrong with you?"

I look over at her and say something like, "That's just how I am."  I thought I played this off pretty well, considering, again, I have zero interest in her.

She gets an "oh, shit" look on her face and meekly moves to the other side of her beta male friend.  She then says, "You look like you're gonna hit me."  I ask her what makes her think that.  She says, "The way you looked at me."  I said, "No, I'm not going to hit a drunk girl at 2am."  She responds, "That's OK.  I can hold my own."

This brings us to yet another Girl Game trick . . .

Provoke him in the hope of getting attention

Girls that have real game know how to agitate a guy into responding.  Recall the chick who threw the "Are you gay?" question at me.  The idea here is to deliberately offend the guy and force him to respond. 

What Asian Girl was doing was stepping outside the social norm.  She questioned an alpha male.  She then implied he was going to break frame and commit an act of violence.  And then when the alpha male says no, she essentially offers up that she would be willing to fight.

The idea here is to use the social need to not appear to be a threat to leverage the guy into a response.  Essentially, it's a "must respond" scenario.  And I did respond.  Once she got a response, she throws in the "I'm a fighter" thing to seem playful, to advertise a bit of joie de vivre.

I didn't smell it out at the time.  But, thing is, I just didn't dig her.  At all.  So, I shook my head and stopped talking to her.

That finally got the point across.  She quietly stood there chatting with her beta male lapdog until her friends came out and they all loudly yakked as they crossed the street and the parking lot.  Off they drove.  End of Asian Girl, at least for that night.

Women don't believe rejection exists

One thing you have to understand is that women have been taught since very early in life that men are all horny fuck monsters that won't turn down a chance at sex.  Or even the chance at auditioning for a chance at sex. 

If a woman rates herself fuckable -- that is, she rates herself a 5 or higher -- she cannot conceive of a scenario where, if she offers herself to a man, he would ever say no.  The only reason, in this logic, that a straight man would ever reject her is if there is another woman present at that exact moment.

When you blunt a woman's advances, it forces her to recalibrate. 

The thing is, once she recalibrates, all bets are off.  She's sailing angry and emotional into uncharted waters. She has no clue what she's going to do.  I can list the responses I've seen . . .

1.  Simply try again.

In my experience, this is the most common response.  Since she has no idea what went wrong -- and she's absolutely sure there's nothing wrong with her -- she simply smashes the button again and sees what happens.  Maybe a wire was loose.  Maybe the guy got distracted.

Fucked if she knows.  Try again.

And some women just keep trying and trying again and get caught in an endless loop.

2.  Blow up.

I'd say this is the second most common response.  If the guy won't go for it, then just attack him and try to provoke a response.  I've actually seen Girl Game do this playfully as an opening move.

In contrast, sincerely blowing up on a guy is the mark of a chick who rates herself very highly.  If she blows up, she does it because the entire premise has thrown her off and she's flying on pure emotion.  At this point, she's totally gameless and doesn't even know why she's doing what she's doing.

3.  Challenge the guy.

What the Asian Girl did.  Put him on the spot.  Demand that he respond.  We've already covered this.

4.  Go big.

Every now and then I get a chick who responds my doubling down repeatedly.  She goes sluttier and more direct.  Go back and read the story of MILF Everest.  The idea here is to just lay so much sex in front of the guy that he can't possible not fuck her. 

It is a pure gambit.  It's also a complete concession to guy's alphaness.  At this point, it's pure surrender.  "Here's the pussy.  I need you to take it."  That's the proposal.

With MILF Everest, she started out shit testing me for Rich Guy Game.  I blew her out and she started pitching different angles until she was outright dry humping me in front of everyone.

"Go big" is a choice that only a woman who rates herself very highly and has never been rejected, ever, by a guy will go for.  She doubles down on sex because she is absolutely sure of the universal truth that men want to fuck her.  She goes big because every time she has ever been attracted to a guy in her life, it has ended in sex.  So, in her view, if a guy is so damned alpha, then this business damn well is ending in sex.  Even if she has to ram that pussy in their sideways.


If there's one thing I hope readers will understand, it's that women do not believe in a world where every guy doesn't want to fuck every woman who is at least average in looks (or better).

For as much as women complain about men being horn dogs, the truth is women cling to that belief without much regard to how demeaning it is to them.  It calls into question the whole notion of romantic love.  It pretty much obliterates and right she has to a sense of self-worth.  In short, it validates a lot of the evil shit men say about women.

But, at least a guy can get sex from it.  That's pretty good, right?

Oh, wait.  I'm always blowing women off and not fucking them.  And then they get angry.  Which is the part I like.  Ah, fuck it, whatever.  Sorry to disappoint.


  1. If a girl tosses out the "Are you gay?" challenge and you don't feel like taking the bait, give it to her straight by saying "No, I'm just not attracted to you" with your best serious face.

    Watch her lose her shit. It's... entertaining to say the least.

    1. I tend to try to just roll with things. Picking fights is not my go-to move.

  2. Have there ever been any exceptions to your rules? For instance, women who you were attracted to physically who just outrightly either didn't notice you or ignored you? Have you ever been in a healthy long term relationship? I've been reading your articles and find them engaging but they all leave me with questions such as these. You make a lot of general statements about women and although I have no desire to invalidate these statements, I do wonder if you feel there are exceptions.

  3. i like this blog. got so much interesting things that i agree with. but i got a question, you have never posted how you actually interact with women; like what do you say to them keeping you aloof vibe?